For as long as I can remember, I've been labeled as "sensitive." In a world that often values toughness, being highly sensitive wasn’t exactly seen as a gift. I was the kid who felt everything intensely—the joy, the pain, the subtle shifts in the air that others seemed to miss. I could sense the slightest change in someone's mood, the unspoken words lingering in a room, or the energy of a place long before anyone else noticed. But instead of feeling empowered by these abilities, I often felt overwhelmed, misunderstood, and even defective.
The Struggles of Sensitivity
Growing up in a low-income rural community in Southern California as the child of immigrants, sensitivity wasn’t exactly a celebrated trait. I was constantly told to "toughen up," to stop crying, and to ignore the things that bothered me. Society didn’t provide much space for someone who felt so deeply. The message was clear: sensitivity was a weakness, something to be managed or, better yet, suppressed.
And for a while, I believed that. I tried to numb myself, to fit in, and to be like everyone else. But it didn’t work. The more I tried to bury my sensitivity, the more disconnected I felt—from myself, from others, and from my own creativity. It was exhausting, and at times, it downright sucked.
The Turning Point
It wasn’t until I began my journey as an artist and therapist that I started to see my sensitivity in a new light. I realized that what I had always viewed as a curse was actually a powerful gift. My sensitivity wasn’t just about feeling too much—it was about feeling deeply, about being attuned to the subtle nuances of the world around me. It was about empathy, intuition, and the ability to connect with others on a profound level.
As I worked with clients who were also highly sensitive, neurodiverse, and queer, I saw how these traits, often dismissed or devalued by society, were actually superpowers. They allowed us to create art that moves people, to offer insights that others might overlook, and to build connections that are authentic and transformative. I began to embrace my sensitivity as a unique strength rather than a flaw.
Understanding High Sensitivity
The term "highly sensitive" was first introduced by Dr. Elaine Aron in the 1990s, through her pioneering research on what she termed the Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). According to Dr. Aron, high sensitivity is a personality trait found in approximately 15-20% of the population. It’s characterized by a deeper cognitive processing of sensory information, heightened emotional reactivity, and increased awareness of subtleties in the environment.
High sensitivity, or Sensory Processing Sensitivity (SPS) as it is scientifically known, isn’t a disorder or condition, but rather a natural variation in temperament.
It’s believed to be an evolutionary trait, offering benefits such as heightened awareness and the ability to process information more thoroughly, which can be invaluable in certain situations. However, in today’s fast-paced, overstimulating world, these traits can sometimes be misunderstood or undervalued, leading to challenges for those who possess them.
Dr. Aron’s research highlighted four key aspects of high sensitivity, often summarized by the acronym DOES:
Depth of Processing: HSPs process information on a deeper level, often reflecting on things more thoroughly than others.
Overstimulation: Due to heightened sensitivity, HSPs can become easily overwhelmed by intense stimuli, whether it’s noise, bright lights, or social interactions.
Emotional Reactivity and Empathy: HSPs tend to have strong emotional responses and a deep capacity for empathy, often feeling others’ emotions as if they were their own.
Sensing Subtleties: HSPs are attuned to the subtle details in their environment, noticing things that might escape the attention of others.
Understanding this trait is important because it can shift the narrative from seeing sensitivity as a weakness to recognizing it as a unique strength. For highly sensitive individuals, this awareness can be empowering, providing a framework to better understand themselves and their needs. It also helps create a more supportive and inclusive environment, where sensitivity is seen as an asset rather than a liability.
High sensitivity plays a crucial role in fostering creativity, deep connections, and innovative thinking—qualities that are invaluable in both personal and professional spheres. By acknowledging and embracing this trait, highly sensitive people can leverage their unique perspectives and strengths to thrive in their lives and contribute meaningfully to the world.
Embracing My Superpower
Today, I see my high sensitivity as an integral part of who I am. It informs my work, my art, and my relationships. It allows me to provide a calm, safe, reflective space for people to tune into their inner wisdom, to forge paths towards their dreams, and to empathize deeply with their journeys. My sensitivity is what allows me to thrive as a therapist, artist, musician, educator, and spiritual leader.
Of course, there are still moments when being highly sensitive can feel like a burden. The world is noisy, chaotic, and often overwhelming. But I’ve learned to navigate these challenges by setting boundaries, practicing mindfulness, asking for help, embracing my needs and limitations, and surrounding myself with supportive, understanding people.
From Struggle to Strength
If you’re a highly sensitive person, I want you to know that your sensitivity is not a weakness. It’s your superpower. It allows you to see the world in ways others can’t, to connect with people on a deeper level, and to create meaningful, life changing connections and art.
Yes, there will be moments when it sucks—when the world feels too loud, too harsh, or too fast. But those moments don’t define you. What defines you is how you choose to use your sensitivity, how you choose to transform it from a source of struggle into a source of strength.
So, here’s to being highly sensitive, to feeling deeply, and to embracing our superpowers. The world needs us now more than ever.